i feel guilty for kissing another guy i feel guilty for kissing another guy

I was devastated. But you sounded like you were willing to take it farther with him,and risk it all. He is the best person I have ever met. Lets get down to the basics here. :-*. Because guilt typically occurs in "micro-bursts" of brief signals, we often underestimate the rather significant role it plays in our daily lives. Please leave me a comment. I mean if a person can't rely on their own strength of character and self-discipline to stop them from crossing that line, they obviously NEED an outside deterrent. Houston, this team needs to rectify the causes or agree to seek outside help in it whilst this one team member needs to atone for having almost embarked on a hurtful and potentially damaging test unilaterally without her teammate's consent. We finally mended fences, but there still is a type of tension between us. I did say gateway to sex at first didn't I. Yup. Period. I know, I need to start a thread. Funny, I have never gotten amorous when I have had too much to drink. It's South of France for us this year, holiday-wise, and then in about a year-and-a-half's time we're off permanently to Espana (por favor). You had too much to drink and you kissed someone who wasnt your boyfriend or your girlfriend. I'm disgusted with myself to think I would do that after just the tiniest bit of attention and flattery. Nooooo, surely not. With the other woman just across the room! I was very drunk. Turning off notifications, deleting messages, and hiding chat apps may all indicate secrecy. Yes, I think if your boyfriend thinks his girl or boy or whatever is gonna be loyal to them even under the influence. She confessed to loving the experience and enjoyed the thrill knowing she had her husbands permission and he was watching her. (No, I'm very passionate about fidelity.) I kissed another guy when drunk but can't remember?! (As you were), It happened to me,too last Jan.31,2016, and it happened again in the following days. So, you went to a party and everyone was drinking. If you want a relationship then be ready to be trustworthy. No, if it's sensible debate, based on *facts* rather than wishful thinking, that's fine. Social media, the Internet, texting and so on. When we went to bed that night, I started crying because I realized what had happened and I felt confused and guilty all at the same time. The first step to a broken loyalty is a first kiss. You knowing you can trust your husband to do the right thing when faced with temptation is all it takes for him to remain blight-free when blight (whether or not wearing fishnets) threatens. It's just a "good weekend?" He deserves to know. I still feel so guilty and I just don't know what to do. Don't feel guilty because you are a mom (or dad) and you feel like you need to be spending time with them. And as for our original subject, who knows maybe she told him. I think it is a better idea for both of you good luck.do share progress. And now you - who finds trust difficult - have been tempted to do your OWN test (already commencedwhilst drunk), approached via the psychological end. Biological ones. I can't get into his FB directly but I accessed his hotmail and read the notification. get into counselling. Can Humans Detect Text by AI Chatbot GPT? Youre not homosexual until youre actually attracted to dudes., MORE : Bella Thorne reveals she is bisexual by kissing a girl in surprise Snapchat, MORE : These are the UKs most powerful LGBT people, Doctor explains why some men faint or get nosebleeds when they get an erection, This is the number of sexual partners the average Brit has had, Mum in coven manifests orgasms and schedules sex magick with husband, Post-pill clarity: I came off contraception and didnt fancy my partner anymore, How I Do It: Its empowering to have a guy over and pleasure myself afterwards, follow-up video of straight girls kissing other girls for the first time, Bella Thorne reveals she is bisexual by kissing a girl in surprise Snapchat, These are the UKs most powerful LGBT people, Do not sell or share my personal information. Since he felt there was an attraction with you two. I calmly told him that I wasnt in love with him, but I did feel some attraction and that I accepted the liquor and the kiss because I was curious to find out if there was anything between us. :-) I mean, *I* don't mind if your relationship continues slowly but surely remaining on the skids, do I. Talk to her about it and explain to her how it hurt you to see them kissing. But, again, it's never what you do, it's the way that you do it, meaning I was careful to be sensitive in the telling. Team spirit is this: Other than that, I've said everything that needs saying soyou lot carry on if you want, but I'm sat back, counting the money. How is that beneficial to him? "and though he immediately pulled away". a wiz veteran at Relationship Talk. I felt disorientated. When I woke up yesterday I still felt drunk but the reality of what happened hit me like a tonne of bricks. If this is bothering you, then tell him. BTW lips are also very much a part of foreplay that's what I've read. You reap what you sow. I always prefer to know if something is going on than find out about it later, or worse, never find out at all (the idea of this chills me). So many arguments begin because our partners got drunk and kissed someone else while they were under the influence of alcohol. I don't know if he wants to still be friends with her on FB or not. Finding it with someone else just accelerates the process. 4. I had a kind of aha reaction because I realized I was attracted to him. I didnt tell him. Now, four years later, I am feeling extreme guilt to the point that it is making me sick and consuming thoughts every minute of the day. Your significant other might get very angry about this, but I believe it depends more on whom you kissed rather than on the fact that you kissed someone else. Assistir Chelsea X Leeds - Ao Vivo Grtis HD sem travar, sem anncios. I'm not married nor have I ever been married. ;-) Truth-seekers are never popular. If I ws on ur place I would never have told him because he loves me so much and respect me so much and really trust me like anything and if you are guilty and try to relieve ur guilt by telling him still doesn't prove to be beneficial for you and other than that it creates a doubt in his heart that would be very mych lowering The respect he has in his heart for you. But, I did find out that I was attracted to my piano teacher. NOT mentioning it could make you come across guilty. But I'll let you off because that was a MacResponse whereas 'a lot to take in', i.e. I like him so so much and I know I was just being drunk and ****. Still, now that the courts are coming down wider and heavier on emotional abuse, I'm sure it's just a matter of time. I felt a mixture of excitement and flattery and nerves. A certain someone might read it. New Mexico sunsets flat lands breathtaking. The short answer to your question, for this BPD is: No, I don't feel guilty. I know true remorse when I see it. So you went and MARRIED someone who was your best FRIEND, not your already Bam!, Pow!, "oh my god there is a god!" If you need help or advice, you can ask Yin & Yang. Even if it is innocent kiss, I am done. Being an authentic partner and holding back secrets does not seem to go well together. So if life hands you lemons, don't HIDE them where they could one day trip you up or cause a rotten stink. Try to let it go and forgive yourself. if you believe you have to tell him exactly as you did here , if your friends you were with are also his say he can ask them . Such as crying,begging that would be enough for me to give them a second chance. When I needed a dresser picked up from a furniture store, he offered to take me to the store and bring the furniture home in his pick up truck. There was a line that was crossed when they kissed, he should no longer have her as a Facebook friend, or any other communication with her. I'm not going to let that or any insulting aspersions, subtle or otherwise, put me off. I stopped and said I couldn't kiss him anymore cause I was dating someone I really liked Am I a terrible person? I am not someone that cheats on people, I am just a nice lad who gets carried away in the moment when drunk. It meant absolutely nothing what so ever but to me, I still class kissing someone else, no matter how long or short time, drunk or not, as cheating! If I receive a text from someone that is flirtatious in anyway, I test the person back and tell them that I do not want anymore flirtatious texts and if we are friends then they need to respect my relationship. Changing jobs or departments and without delay, those things that aren't rocket science, is definitely what I as a fractionally betrayed partner would call you putting your rueful money where your rueful mouth is - enough to help reassure permanently. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. I feel sorry for those with depression, mental illness, hangnails, bad hair, bad childhood memories, etc. You drank and you kissed. I wouldn't want to hear about it if I were in his position. - GET THE FUCK OUT. Spoiler alert: Not that different from kissing a girl, only they dont fancy them. If he wants to keep her as a "friend", complete access is a must. We use cookies on our site to remember your preferences, monitor site traffic and offer personalised ads. I have posted a vent and been waiting for your scathing reply. Then he kissed me, and I kissed him back. I also could not fathom if you were ACTUALLY being serious or just having a laugh at her expense..alone in your tracky bottoms in your living room. stop any contact (outside of work) immediately. Your guilt is your punishment. Own your truth- You did not expect to hear the REAL TRUTH and the RIGHT ADVICE. We lived in a small town at the time, and it felt like avoiding this girl was nearly impossible. Just trying to keep the pot stirred,the fire burning. A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2006): Hey sweetie my Name is Jilian I have a boyfriend as well and we have been dating for 3 months, I have had past relationships that have gone on for 11 months, I have cheated on my past boyfriend andi felt so terrible andi was in the same situation as you are, sweetie i know how you feel. The guilt may be strong because you doubt yourself right now and were surprised by your actions. I'm really surprised that everyone is saying "It's just a kiss" and to not tell the SO. lover. Here are the frightening ways to know that he gave another girl a kiss ; 1. I certainly took full responsibility for my actions, and fortunately the guy I kissed also took responsibility for his actions. It was just a kiss. It really depends on the dynamics of your relationship though. Try-it-on, cheating sleazebag makes pass at loyally-married woman; And the tricky piece de resistance Talk About Family, Marriage and Relationships, My magic wand would remove shame from sexuality for all! This guy wouldnt take money from me (I should have seen this as a Red Flag, but didnt), so I bought him opera scores in order to compensate him for his time and expertise. The other day, I had a first with my partner Flo: I put my tongue in another man's mouth while he stood by only to observe. My SO and I had been dating two years. By clicking 'Accept and continue' you consent to our use of cookies in accordance with your preferences which can be reviewed / updated at any time via our Privacy Policy. male Right,undoubtedly you didn't say what Tillybops wanted to hear. I thanked him for telling me this and we didnt speak to one another for years. Now that you got drunk, you feel justified in kissing that person because you got drunk and couldnt help yourself. I regret waiting so long to tell him.-2 months. Then you must be doing it wrong. His imagination could go haywire over that one. You might feel guilty about it the next day, but it wasnt a big deal. It sounds like you are projecting your own fears onto him. Not Opening Up To You Anymore Don't feel guilty. HIKARI, you can't take up an obsolete thread as your own, no matter any similarities, so if you want feedback and advice it's best to start a new one (and copy and paste that post into it as your opening post), okay? Lead to or gateway to, I guess there's a difference. Lol This feels huge to me. I am heartbroken but told him I understand that I couldnt be with someone who doesnt trust me. Okay. Mr S lived there once (San Fransisco), but he hasn't any urge to return, either. i think OP is using 'kiss' to mean 'more than kiss', but whatever, it was 4 years ago in a rough patch.. everyone here is wrong. Should I tell him or just get on with my life and put this whole sorry mess behind me? (and more like her as well, please, Bartender! Way to make someone who, already understands and feels terrible guilt for what they've done, feel chronically worse. I love your stories, Foxie. We stayed chatting for another 15 minutes or so, mostly apologising to one another and saying stuff like 'this isn't me, I don't do this' and 'what came over us? Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. You were drunk and you kissed - One of those long young people type kisses too . I appreciate you taking the time to reply to me, I can see you feel very passionate about infidelity, however, on this occassion I won't be taking your advice. I was drunk but that is no excuse. Houston? I guess it's the nature of the topic - emotive yet one of those Grey areas. Im also pleased that you agreed with my argument as to when to fess up and when to keep your mouth shut. In a way you are trading his peace of mind for yours, do you really think that you will accomplish anything by doing that? And what Simone Bienne said on the love line. He said I was a person and offered to ride me home. in my opinion I don't see why you would feel guilty you did nothing . This. Your boyfriend may love you so much that he believes you won't repeat the cheating ever again. SO if you shouldn't, then A) you should be able to tell him, and B) if he's the type to hit the roof over a kiss, he's a wee bit paranoid for his own good, and it wouldn't be *your* fault. Most people would never confess that's the reality. It how you deal with it that makes the difference. Weve probably all known silly drunks, mean drunks and people who simply couldnt hold their liquor and vomited all over the place. he said the situations arent at all the same bc he doesnt feel turned on by me kissing another guy the way i do from a male on male kiss. Egon Ronay-level Petit Degustation, requires the corresponding amount of TIME in which to do so. Lees theory has a big vulnerability. On which note - "Marriage is about trust not tryst": I like that saying. He has assignments at different sites, and for the last four weeks he has been at the same place. What if they were married? So as far I doing it wrong I wouldn't know. One day, he came over with a bottle of whisky and he had already been drinking. See what she has to say. But the guilt is killing me. This post is probably the most intelligent and insightful posts Ive seen on this site. reader, Angel-lee+, writes (25 October 2005): A To submit your vote please sign in or sign up, it is free and takes a few seconds. Later, I spoke to my fianc and he told me he loved me and was sorry. Houston, well, whaddayaknow - I'M PREGNANT! My husband wasnt home at the time. (Sorry you got cheated on. Iam a bisexual man and kissing a female is a different feeling then with a male. Other way around. Scopes: Yes, the kids are the real victims. I wouldn't be able to sleep at night. We have only been seeing each other for the past two months and I dont want his mind racing with bad thoughts. There is no earthly reason that your partner needs to know chapter and verse of every indiscretion you ever engaged in. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 6 months and I feel so guilty. I am 100% sure he will forgive you and will love you even more for telling him (which you should have done A LONG TIME AGO). In Jung's theory, the anima makes up the totality of the unconscious feminine psychological qualities that a man possesses and the animus the masculine ones possessed by a woman. Three women and one guy went back. I didnt hear from my piano teacher for at least two weeks after that. But I don't see the need to borrow trouble by telling your boyfriend if you have learned your lesson and know you will never do something like that again. When he finally called me up, he said that he needed to stay away from me, much as he enjoyed teaching me music, he felt that the next time we met, things could get even worse and he didnt want to destroy my marriage. but all of a sudden I feel REALLY angry. When we got there the drinks flowed again , and more laughter and story telling. I know it was wrong and I regret it all. Then I ordered taxis, woke up the other girl and we left. If he is nervous at you looking at his messages and also refuses to tell you who she is, he is hiding quite alot. It's mos becoming serious and we really like each other! Which may not seem like a big deal for some of you. I believe that over time this would have happened with or without the wiskey. I cannot tell you how much I love my boyfriend and how shocked I am about this. Old Medication, New Use: Can Prazosin Curb Drinking? You already have internalized that part. For the fact that I'd have to go into mass production, LOL. Like stateside, maybe southern California or San Diego? If you kissed a stranger while you were drunk, dont worry about it. I mean that in a funny way. I feel sorry for the visually impaired but that doesn't mean I want a blind person flying my airplane and my compassion won't make the flight any safer. I waited for the right time ?? Loyal Girl sorry to hear about your situation. I believe in complete honesty, 100%. If it in the meantime hits a nerve and makes you uncomfortable or even gets you all het up, that's your problem, not mine. You can even introduce is as you 'having something to tell him that you're very proud of yourself over and wholly expect will make him proud of you too'..such as: The straight guys get into it, theres no doubt they even end up biting the LGBT guys. 507 views, 8 likes, 5 loves, 10 comments, 6 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Scrittori a domicilio: Mattia Insolia, Cieli in fiamme (Mondadori) con. I felt disorientated. female Whoever did it, doesnt matter. All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft, Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column. Jam, your wife holds the cards. This is the decission you need to make do you want to risk all (career, home, kids as well as your DH) and be in a position you can pursue a relationship with this married man - who may well reject you for more than a fling. The way it happened-not so good! Everyone makes mistakes and it's how you deal with them afterwards that is the most important thing. I knew you liked him/her. You confessed your sins. I dont know what else to do. He also sent me a mean text that said for me to go f myself and to stay away from him. When you're in a long-term relationship, it's normal to have a little crush on someone other than your partner. I feel like I am hypnotized by the guy. Foxie: There was something missing in my marriage. But please seperate the issues. Thank you. Well, time for some fun questions: would you be telling him about it just to alleviate your own guilt? :-). I'm going to be the best wife I can be going forward. Having eyes for someone else while you're married is seen to be wildly inappropriate. Damn, my husband is such a good person and we were together for almost 7 years now. [3] you couldn't extend to him the same courtesy he'd already extended to *you* (i.e. You cheated. Sometimes it doesnt help to tell your partner everything. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. As time elapsed, I realized that I was attracted to him and this began to concern me. It happens, in other words. I was very drunk. I think my husband could maybe forgive the kiss, but the doubt would be there, he would wonder if this could happen again, and he would be so hurt. Oh my god, (Brodie)bit my tongue! yells James. I was so drunk, I barely remember the kiss, but I know it happened. Y'know what it all boils down to the lips. :p. You're quite correct, though, I did forget the typical-forum rule of only ever responding with whatever would leave me super-popular, particularly amongst the most naive and dupe-able who 'can't tell' quite a lot. Have another little thinkipoos (with or without a little drinkipoos). I guess kissing another when married, with or without the other knowing about it is a sore subject. It ended up leading to a follow-up video of straight girls kissing other girls for the first time. Itachi, Lees theory can backfire, especially if the person really believes you are talking about someone else and then he/she finds out you are talking about someone that YOU did. He deserves the right to make the decision on whether he can forgive you and move on with you. "but the fact I work with this person and have to continue to work with him. " You can keep quiet and resolve never to do this again. To be honest, my stomach is sick with the thoughts of the whole thing. However one night a boy kissed me and I kissed him back. I didnt blame the alcohol because I knew I had feelings for my piano teacher, and I didnt want to pretend the feelings didnt exist. Need help with your relationship? You even said it indirectly in your story, when said you decided to get drunk. She has just sent a private message to him on FB. Helping ppl have the sex life they truly want thru writing & education. I think your just another female using your man until a better option comes along your husband should dump you because one of these days your going dump him if he doesnt. He was so drunk himself that he started singing I Love Paris and, in the middle of the song, he said in a gruff voice, You wanna kiss me? Guess what his response was? We were good friends for a few years and have dated in the past but nothing serious. I also agree with SUSIEDQQ that is won't be the worse thing that will ever happen to her or her marriage. You're not attracted to him? I want to break down and cry. Saying that, however, I note you wrote: It's good you feel guilty, that means your not cheating pond scum. Should find time to respond tomorrow.